Initial Visit Checklist: What to Bring and Observe at a Funeral Home

The thought of walking into a funeral home to make arrangements is probably one of the most dreaded tasks on your list. Your head is swimming with grief, and the idea of a formal meeting to discuss final arrangements feels impossible. You’re likely wondering, “What do I even need to bring? What am I supposed to say? What am I even looking for?” It’s a lot, I know. But going in with a simple checklist can make you feel more prepared and grounded.

Think of this as your survival guide for that first visit. We’re going to break down the practical things you need to have with you, and then the more subtle, “gut-check” things you should be paying attention to as you walk through the door. It’s about being prepared, not just to answer their questions, but to ask your own.

Part 1: What to Bring With You

Gathering these items beforehand can save you a lot of back-and-forth phone calls and unnecessary stress. Many of them are needed for official paperwork, like the death certificate and the obituary. If you don’t have all of this, don’t panic—just bring what you can.

• Personal Information of the Deceased:
  • Full legal name, address, and Social Security number.
  • Date and place of birth and death.
  • Parents’ full names (including mother’s maiden name).
  • Marital status.
  • Education and work history, including their last employer and job title.
  • Military service information (DD-214 form), if applicable.
• Official Documents:
  • Any existing funeral pre-arrangement plans.
  • Life insurance policies or information.
  • Deeds to burial property or cemetery paperwork.
  • The will or trust documents, if you have them.
• Personal Items:
  • A recent photo of your loved one (for the obituary and service).
  • Clothing for the burial or viewing (including undergarments and shoes).
  • Any jewelry or personal effects you want them to wear.

Part 2: What to Observe & Ask About

This part is all about using your senses and your gut. You’re not just there to drop off paperwork; you’re there to see if this is the right place to entrust with your loved one’s care. Use this visit to see if what you read in funeral home reviews holds up in person.

First, take a deep breath. Observe the atmosphere. Does the place feel peaceful and well-kept, or does it seem rushed or messy? Do the staff members seem genuinely compassionate and respectful? Pay attention to the little things—the cleanliness, the lighting, the way they talk to you and to each other. These are all clues.

Next, use your visit to get key information. This is where your preparedness comes in handy. You can use your visit to confirm everything from pricing to the types of services they offer.

• Ask to See Their General Price List (GPL). This is your legal right under The Funeral Rule. It’s the most important document you can get, and it’s your key to being able to compare funeral home prices without any pressure.
• Check for Transparency. Observe if they are forthcoming with information or if you have to dig for it. A good funeral director will be transparent and open. You can get more specific with your inquiries by having a list of questions for funeral directors ready to go.
• Assess their Flexibility. Do they seem willing to accommodate your family’s unique needs, whether for a cultural tradition or a specific type of service? This can be a sign of a good fit, especially if you’re looking for a specialized funeral home that caters to specific requests.
• Consider the Vibe. Does the place feel like a family-run business or a large corporation? This can often be a signal of the kind of experience you’ll have. If you’re not sure, it’s a good time to think about the pros and cons of local vs. a chain funeral home.

One final tip: Don’t feel pressured to make a final decision during this first visit. It’s okay to take the information and leave. You are making a huge decision, and you deserve the time and space to think about it clearly. A good funeral home will respect that. Take a moment, step outside, and breathe. You’re doing the best you can.